What truly motivates us?

It has been more than a couple of weeks since I have been quarantined inside my beautiful house with my mother. Recently back from a trip to Sikkim. It wasn’t an experience that I had expected. It was underwhelming. I always had a feeling that it is the mountains, with their breathtaking vista, that excites me. The stars at night, the cloudy dull evenings. Perhaps I was wrong. I find peace in the plains, the beaches.

“Man is a social animal”. I had learned this phrase during my school days from a book which had a collection of many more phrases which I could use to impress my English teacher. Like an innocent child who was always in the company of his parents and friends, it never occurred to me what meaning truly lies behind this phrase. Only now do I get its essence. Going through five years of college has taught me. I cannot stay in solitude for a long stretch. And I speak for the masses when I say so. The company of even a single individual is abundance.

Life is a journey. You pick up experiences on your way and that’s how you build yourself up. Two weeks of being locked up inside the house have done more harm to me than good, if at all. There is no sense of motivation, no desire to improve, no inspiration to get up and do sets of pushups. It has vanished. I am allowing myself to be consumed by my electronic gadgets. What has brought me to this? Do I not have a goal anymore, am I living on my past successes? Giving in easily to the smallest of desires which flood open gates of dopamine. I must muster up the courage to defy this damaging hunger for instant gratification.

I have come a long way. These five years of college have instilled in me the knowledge which many might crave. Maybe I am just boasting. How does it matter, when I cannot use this knowledge to gather myself up. Have I fallen too deep already? I doubt that. I believe it is a fallacy. You can get up and go whenever you are ready. Kill the negative thoughts, banish the evil, rise and shine. It is never too late.

I am absorbing the mesmerising view of the dusky sky with soulful music ringing into my ears. The past is forgotten. It is today which defines you and tomorrow which shapes you. Today is my day, I shall go and find my calling.

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